The internet is an immense monster that continually kidnaps my attention. It rips me away from my innocent search for a dinner recipe to a world of humiliating parkour fails and magic trick tutorials, before throwing me down a rabbit hole of insufferable-yet-addictive TikTok trends. Still, I love it. It’s digital Stockholm syndrome. So here we are. You’re on the internet now too, reading about me writing about the internet. Allow me to throw you down a rabbit hole of curated distraction.
1. Hey God! Hey Angel!
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Some believe humour is an intricately constructed art form of psychosocial techniques designed to shift the audience from a state of safety into chaos … or you can make comedy gold with a dumb pun and a paper towel beard.
2. Brooklyn Nine-Nine’s police lineup
There is something gleefully perfect about this sequence. Sure, it’s a terrific premise for a sketch. Sure, the Backstreet Boys song is a great nostalgic choice. But I think what I love the most about this scene is the fact that the big laughs don’t come from anyone in the regular cast, but from the smaller actors. They are all hilarious, each with different vocal delivery and awkward demeanour. However, Number Five really commits … murder.
3. www.HowManyDaysSinceMontagueStreetBridgeHasBeenHit.com
In South Melbourne, there’s an overpass that is seemingly invisible to truck drivers. The Montague Street bridge is legendary for having a wrecked truck stuck under it, on average, every 45.97 days. How do I know this stat? Because the website www.howmanydayssincemontaguestreetbridgehasbeenhit.com has meticulously recorded (and celebrated) every time a truck smashes into the bridge … with graphs, real-time statistics and glorious photos.
4. Electroboom
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The internet is full of experts teaching you how to do complicated things the correct way. This guy is not one of those people. I don’t know much about Electroboom, but I have a lot of questions. So many questions. The first one is: “How are you still alive?”
5. Prank on grandma in Walmart
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I don’t know why I laugh every time I watch this. Maybe it’s the audacity of the time-consuming Photoshopping, the reverse-shoplifting to plant the artwork in Walmart and the attention to detail in the graphics. Maybe it’s just the cheekiness of the idea. Or maybe it’s having the prankster’s potty-mouthed granny discovering each cover, one by one, in a rollercoaster of emotion. A journey of discovery.
6. Prof Doherty’s lockdown tweet
Dan Murphy opening hours
— Prof. Peter Doherty (@ProfPCDoherty) April 27, 2020
The Nobel prize-winning Australian immunologist Prof Peter Doherty became the “voice of the people” during the 2020 Melbourne lockdown when his Google search was mistakenly tweeted at 1.40am on a Monday night.
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7. Adam the duck’s first swim
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They say comedy equals tragedy plus time. The exception is this video, which has total hopeless tragedy in near zero time, yet comedy is the only result.
8. Bob Katter’s pivot from same-sex marriage to crocodile attacks
Who could forget the Australian MP Bob Katter telling us that he wouldn’t spend more time talking about the same-sex marriage postal vote because – JOLLY FACE INSTANTLY MORPHS INTO ANGRY DEATH-STARE – every three months a person is torn to pieces by a crocodile!!! This is a masterclass in the abrupt segue. It’s the conversational equivalent of someone suddenly pulling the handbrake, causing your car to plummet into croc-infested waters.
9. Bad cosplay
I love cosplay, but what I love more is bad cosplay. There’s nothing more joyous than watching someone put no effort into their costume. Even better: too much effort but with poor execution. Try to un-see Bert and Ernie of your nightmares.
10. People trying to sell mirrors
My newest “art” obsession is typing “Mirror” on FB Marketplace to enjoy adorable images of people trying to avoid being in the reflection… (1/7) pic.twitter.com/IiB3hZ1y3t
— Lawrence Leung (@Lawrence_Leung) January 15, 2022
One weekend in 2022, I became obsessed with people on Facebook Marketplace who were trying to sell old mirrors. In the ads, the sellers all hilariously struggled with avoiding being seen in the mirror as they took photos of it. I put some of my favourite ads up on Twitter … and, as expected, the internet delivered. It turned out other people shared the same obsession and there were already dedicated accounts like @sellingamirror devoted to archiving such wonders. The internet invited me to other collections of my favourite new genre of art: photos of disembodied hands holding phones and amateur photographers hiding behind furniture. Ah, comedy bliss.
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Lawrence Leung is performing his online comedy show Connected as part of Progress festival by Monash University Performing Arts Centre on 31 August. He is also appearing in the ABC’s new show WTFAQ, starting on 30 August.
